Sunday, June 16, 2013
Friday, June 14, 2013
It's a little late but we're finally getting ready for the little big mans birthday party. I may be going all out on this. I'm not sure. He's just precious. I'm not spending much money. I refuse to. I'm making some gluten free cupcakes that will look like little monkeys and Makenna wants me to make Hayden his own little yellow cake. I'll have to think about that one because I hadn't planned to. I'm making all the decorations. It won't cost much at all but it will be a super cute first birthday. I hope I can manage all this with 3 of us being sick. Hayden is finally starting to feel a little better. Nate is passed out on the couch right now because he is miserably sick. He didn't call out of work today but when he got there they started looking for a replacement for him and found one so he was able to come back home. I'm not feeling all that great but I'm managing 3 kids the best I can with the sickness that I have. So, preparing for the party should be interesting to say the least. I'm looking forward to celebrating!
Sunday, June 9, 2013
I love hearing from my friend in Thailand! It makes my heart happy with each email I receive from her. I'm hoping God will put together a trip for me to go there soon. I miss her so much! It's a pretty big deal to move to Thailand as a permanent mission trip. I admire her heart, courage and selflessness. She get's it! To hear the things that happened there last week...the way God put such small things together to make some incredibly big things happen, it's so cool and so encouraging.
I'll see you one day soon my friend! I love you and love what you're doing!
I'll see you one day soon my friend! I love you and love what you're doing!
Sunday, June 2, 2013
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Taking an Honest and Spiritual Inventory
This has to be the absolute hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I know I have said that before with other things but that's because those things were hard but THIS IS HARDER.
"Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord" Lamentations 3:40
So, taking an honest and spiritual inventory of myself is painful and frustrating. I worked on it maybe a total of 3 hours over the past 3 or 4 months. That doesn't seem like a lot and that's because it isn't a lot. I worked the first hour on it and was exhausted. I put it down for about a month and then did another straight hour. That time I got so upset and emotional that I had to put away and it's been another month and here I am again. I've only worked on it for about 20 minutes and I am stuck.
We're talking answering questions like...
"Who is the object of my resentment or fear?"
"What specific actions did that person take that hurt me?"
"What effect did that action have on my life; both past and present?"
"What damage did that action do to my basic social, security and/or sexual instincts?"
"What part of the resentment am I responsible for?"
"Who are the people I have hurt?"
"How have I hurt them?"
If you have caught on to why this is painful and frustrating, good! I have only made it through the first person and there are many more people on my list. I could only get the second persons name written and had to put it down. Questions like these are intense but I want to follow through with this because there is going to be such freedom and healing in this process. Not only will I write out honest things but I will go over all of it with someone that I trust. What a challenge. This is so hard. I'm in this for the freedom and healing. Nothing more. Nothing less.
"Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord" Lamentations 3:40
So, taking an honest and spiritual inventory of myself is painful and frustrating. I worked on it maybe a total of 3 hours over the past 3 or 4 months. That doesn't seem like a lot and that's because it isn't a lot. I worked the first hour on it and was exhausted. I put it down for about a month and then did another straight hour. That time I got so upset and emotional that I had to put away and it's been another month and here I am again. I've only worked on it for about 20 minutes and I am stuck.
We're talking answering questions like...
"Who is the object of my resentment or fear?"
"What specific actions did that person take that hurt me?"
"What effect did that action have on my life; both past and present?"
"What damage did that action do to my basic social, security and/or sexual instincts?"
"What part of the resentment am I responsible for?"
"Who are the people I have hurt?"
"How have I hurt them?"
If you have caught on to why this is painful and frustrating, good! I have only made it through the first person and there are many more people on my list. I could only get the second persons name written and had to put it down. Questions like these are intense but I want to follow through with this because there is going to be such freedom and healing in this process. Not only will I write out honest things but I will go over all of it with someone that I trust. What a challenge. This is so hard. I'm in this for the freedom and healing. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Yay for summer classes! Not...
I'm excited because I have a set goal that I can immediately put my mind to and I'm excited that I have classes to mark off the list again very soon. I'm kind of bummed that it involved 6 credit hours for the summer. That isn't a lot but it is when you're a mother of three children that will be home every day throughout the summer. I keep having to remind myself that getting these classes out of the way will help me tremendously over the next two years because I shouldn't have more than 11 credit hours each semester here on out. That will be much more beneficial to me and I will be able to put all of my focus into Radiology and that's what I need to do. I need a good system for the summer... Hmm... I'll have to think more on this.
I'm excited because I have a set goal that I can immediately put my mind to and I'm excited that I have classes to mark off the list again very soon. I'm kind of bummed that it involved 6 credit hours for the summer. That isn't a lot but it is when you're a mother of three children that will be home every day throughout the summer. I keep having to remind myself that getting these classes out of the way will help me tremendously over the next two years because I shouldn't have more than 11 credit hours each semester here on out. That will be much more beneficial to me and I will be able to put all of my focus into Radiology and that's what I need to do. I need a good system for the summer... Hmm... I'll have to think more on this.
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