Game On

I believe I'm finally coming to the point where I can put words to how I've been feeling lately. In a way I feel like a teenager again with all the insecurities that come with the different ages within the those years and the way one attemps to find themselves during all of the changes. Of course it's different now than it was then because I am married with 2 children and nearly 4 months pregnant. The deal here is that I can't change my family, nor do I want to, but I have to be able to find who I am again in the midst of being responsible for 3 other lives.
Being in school is so much different than when I was a teenager. Of course! I have 3 other lives that are dependant on me. I don't have time to sit around and let my mind wander away with me and see where my thoughts lead me and what kind of creativity may come from it. That used to be one of my favorite things. I can't take an adequate amount of time to focus on my homework like I need to. I can't get lost in my studies and be where I want to be with them. It's nearly impossible. I'm not complaining about any of this. I'm letting myself know that I realize how different things are so I can figure out a way to make it all into a happy little mesh of things.
I'm not miserably sick every day now and I'm am extremely thankful for that! Now I have 2 months worth of things to catch up on because of the sickness. Luckily, I am very healthy now that it's time for finals but I have to do so well on them to make up for not doing so well because of being sick. I'm just hoping to manage my time well enough to do the best I can.
So, now that I have a few things figured out in my mind, I have to find a way to actively stay on top of things and apparently do it differently than I ever have. It sure seems complicated but at least I can put my thoughts in the right direction now rather than aimlessly thinking about why things don't make sense to me.
Maybe that was a mouthful of blabber that just went through my finger tips onto a computer screen but at least it's out of my head and I know which direction I'm going now. It's time to get more motivated than usual and get myself back on track.

"Lord move in the way that I've never seen before, There's a mountain in the way and a lock on the door, I'm drifting away, Waves are crashing on the shore, Lord move, Move or move me" - FFH

Word Vomit

I'm feeling rather stressed. I haven't been keeping up with school well because of the sickness I've had. All the throwing up and not being able to eat and being dehydrated and having to have 2,000 cc of IV fluid this week have really added up. I'm trying to be a good wife and mother but that's so hard when you can't get your own butt out of bed. I've missed all my classes this week because of being so sick. I have a make up test in math today and I don't feel ready for it at all. I was hoping to have until next Tuesday to do it but that didn't work out. I guess I should be most thankful that I at least get to do it and no get a ZERO on it. That would suck! So, I'll do my best and see what that gets me.
I'm ready to feel better. I wasn't this sick with either of my other pregnancies and I didn't expect it to get this bad. I just want to feel good so I can keep up with life again.
I won't be going to Thailand as originally planned, also because of this sickness. Maybe it's God's way of showing me it's best for me to stay home right now. I know this baby is more important than most things and I have to remember that. It's just sucking the life out of me. However, every time we get to see the little one in an ultrasound, it makes it all worth it to me. One day I'll get to hold the little booger and that will make it all even better.
I HAVE to keep my head up and keep myself going. It's all worth it. Every ounce of vomit. Every bit of lost energy. Everything. Maybe I'll feel better soon. Hopefully at least enough to be able to enjoy some amazing turkey dinners since we'll be in the country afterall :) Can't wait to see all of my family then too!

I have learned two things this morning from my wonderful daughter. Coloring Dora the Explorer papers with crayons is much more enjoyable than studying for the history exam  I have tomorrow and also that the word "diggie" means "poof". Who knew?! Ha! I love her :)

I never knew how much fun it would be to teach my little girl how to put her hair up in a ponytail. She has so much patience that I've never seen before. We're having a super time. Girls days are the best!

Precious Ginger

The news is definitely official now. Baby number 3 is on it's way! I found out a week and a half ago. I'm very excited! Although the sickness that comes along with this journey isn't very exciting, the rest of it is. I haven't been terribly sick and I'm hoping that this is the worst it will get but something tells me not to get my hopes too high on that one.

I would say that Isaiah and Makenna are excited about having a baby brother or sister. Makenna will rub my belly and kiss it and talk to the baby. Isaiah will tell me to open my mouth and then he'll yell inside my mouth thinking the baby will hear him that way. Both of them are precious with their ways of showing how they're excited. We told them about a week ago and that was such a wonderful day!

I'm going to try Ginger Tea tomorrow to see if it will help settle my stomach in the mornings and in the evenings. The evenings are a little worse than the mornings so I may have an afternoon tea ritual before long. 

So much to do to get ready for this baby but all will be worth it!

Tooth Fairy

I got to pull Isaiah's tooth this morning! It's been loose for about a month and it's been barely hanging on the past couple days  This morning while I brushed his teeth I noticed that it was turning nearly all the way around when I went over it with the toothbrush, so I decided this was the last day for it to hang on. After convincing him to open his moth for me to touch it, I gave it a quick yank and then we both just looked at each other with wide eyes. He kept saying "What? What?!" Then I showed him his tooth in my hand and we both giggled at each other.
While he rinsed his mouth out, he gave me a wink :) He told me on the way to school that he was happy I wasn't asleep because Daddy might have pulled it instead. He was happy that I did it for him.
Another Mommy-Isaiah moment to go down in history.